I WAS BROUGHT INTO THIS SHITHOLE IN THE YEAR OF 1999 AND FOR EVERY MINUTE OF EVERY HOUR OF EVERY DAY OF IT I HAVE FELT NOTHING BUT PAIN

THE PEOPLE THAT WERE SUPPOSED TO LOVE ME AND PROTECT ME AND RAISE ME TURNED ME INTO A FUCKING PUNCHING BAG, THEY WERE SELF INDULGENT AND ONLY CARED ABOUT THEMSELVES. THEY LET ME GET IN HARMS WAY, THEY LET MY COUSIN VIOLENTLY RAPE ME WHEN I WAS JUST A FUCKING CHILD AND THEY SWEPT IT UNDER THE RUG LIKE IT WAS NOTHING.

THE NIGHTMARES HAUNT ME EVERY FUCKING NIGHT, AND YET THE PEOPLE WHO DEFLOWERED ME AND BEAT THE SHIMMER AND SPARK AND GLEAM OUT OF ME ARE NOT SUFFERING. I BEAR THE WEIGHT OF THE CONSEQUENCES THAT BELONG TO THE SICK FUCKS THAT TORTURED ME FOR THE FIRST TWENTY ONE YEARS OF MY LIFE.

I WANT TO SCRUB MY BODY WITH A SCOURER UNTIL MY SKIN AND FLESH IS SANDED OFF MY BONES AND TURNS INTO DUST, ONLY TO BE RINSED DOWN THE SHOWER DRAIN. I DON'T WANT TO BE IN THIS FORM ANYMORE. THIS FORM IS NEVER ENDING PAIN AND SUFFERING, THAT'S WHY THEY CONCEIVED ME TO BEGIN WITH. TO SUFFER AS AN EMPTY HUSK THEY CAN BEAT AND ABUSE AND FUCK THE SHIT OUT OF. IF THERE IS A GOD THEN HE WILL HAVE TO BEG FOR MY FORGIVENESS.